There are a million things to think about when you are expecting a child. Mom’s nutrition, baby’s health, nursery colors, baby’s name, etc. However, there are many women today who are handling their pregnancies a little differently. These moms may not be overly concerned about self-care, their baby’s nursery theme, or what color their take-home outfit will be; these women live through an entirely different 9 months. These brave women have made an adoption plan.

Unfortunately, many birth moms admit to not participating in self-care during their pregnancy. They might feel undeserving of care, attention, and happiness. So today, we are suggesting 2 simple ways to practice self-care during your pregnancy. 

1. Acceptance with Meditation: Adoption is an incredibly difficult decision to make, and you will likely experience days of doubt during your pregnancy. If you find yourself struggling with your decision, take a few minutes to meditate on the choice you’re thinking of making.  Try to understand that adoption is not a selfish act but rather a selfless one. Think about your baby. What are your hopes and wishes for them? And then think about yourself. What are your hopes, dreams, and wishes for your life? Do they align? If not, that’s okay. During your pregnancy, nothing is final. This is your opportunity to really consider every option and come to a decision you are proud of and one that is the best for both you and your child.

2. Honor Your Child, By Honoring Yourself: There may be a time in your child’s life when they begin asking questions. Who was my birth mom? What did she do? Why did she make an adoption plan? Depending on the level of openness in your adoption, you may have the opportunity to answer these questions. But if not, try taking some time to write down a little bit about yourself. Try answering the following questions:

   • Why am I deserving of love?

   • Why you (my child) were deserving of happiness?

   • What do I wish for myself and our relationship?

   • What do I wish for your parents and their relationship with you?

   • Who am I?

   • Who do I hope to be?

By answering these questions, you will begin to honor your child. When you take ownership of the choices you’ve made, and your dreams and hopes, you begin to honor yourself. These questions might not be something you are able or comfortable sharing with your child, but they will always be something you have done for yourself. 

1. Establishing a Support System: We have already discussed taking time for yourself, by yourself. Now we look at finding others who are open to listen. Do you have a person in your life you trust to be honest and supportive regardless of your decision? If yes, let them help you! There is no reason you have to be alone in this pregnancy. This person could be a family member, friend or the father of the baby. Talk to them about your concerns, fears, and hopes. They may be able to give you a perspective you had not considered.

If there is not someone in your life that you trust, go online to look for pregnancy counselors, a birthparent chat group or crisis line. You will find someone to listen. At Hope Cottage a counselor is available 24/7 to listen and provide honest, non-biased feedback and information about pregnancy and adoption. You are never truly alone in this journey.To speak to one of our pregnancy counselors call: 469.418.4518